Would Your 11-Year-Old Self Be Proud?
How reflecting on who you’ve become reveals the discipline of real change
Would your 11-year-old self be proud of who you’ve become?
It’s not a question we ask often. Life moves fast. We make choices, face challenges, adapt — or don’t — and somehow we end up here. But every so often, it’s worth stopping to ask, How did I get here? Am I proud of this version of me?
That question can stir up discomfort. Because it forces us to acknowledge something we tend to overlook: we change.
Constantly. Quietly. Sometimes for the better, sometimes just for convenience.
And yet, for something so inevitable, we rarely talk about change. We talk about goals, systems, and success, but not the slow, subtle transformations that either lead us closer to who we want to be or quietly pull us away.
Where was I when I was 11?
I remember that year clearly.
It was a tough one.
My family moved towns, and that shift affected me in ways I couldn’t fully understand at the time: new friends, new school, new routines. Everything changed.
That 11-year-old boy didn’t know that the disruption would open doors to lifelong friendships. He didn’t know it would spark a curiosity that would turn into a career, playing with his favorite toy, a computer. He didn’t know the same path would eventually take him miles away from his family to build his own.
But that boy, full of hope and wonder, still lives within me.
As we grow older, life trains us to be less surprised. Our curiosity fades. Our humor shifts. The things that once made us laugh now make us cringe. At 11, I could laugh at the dumbest stuff — honestly, I wish I still could.
Becoming a father brought some of that back. I see my kids marvel at planes and the moon, bursting into laughter at silly faces and funny sounds. I try to laugh with them. I try to do it authentically.
Looking back, I’ve changed a lot. I’ve made difficult decisions.
And I wouldn’t change a thing.
Today, I’m building a beautiful life with my wife, providing for our family, and carving out time to reflect, to journal, and to keep growing.
Life has been good.
Change has been good.
And that’s what I want to talk about.
Change is the foundation of growth
There is no discipline without change.
If we think discipline is just about sticking to a plan or staying the same, we’re missing the point. Real discipline is about being willing to become. It’s about choosing who we want to grow into and having the flexibility to evolve along the way.
This is why plasticity matters. The ability to shift, adapt, and reshape ourselves when the moment calls for it isn’t a side effect of discipline; it’s a cornerstone. Without that, discipline becomes brittle. It turns into stubbornness, not strength.
You can’t call yourself disciplined if you’re unwilling to realign.
Why we resist change
Change often feels threatening because it challenges our sense of identity. We might ask, if I shift my goals, was I wrong before? If I adjust my path, does that mean I failed?
But perhaps that's the wrong lens.
Neuroscience reveals that our brains are wired to favor predictability. The amygdala, known as the brain's fear center, becomes activated in response to uncertainty, triggering a threat response , even when the change might be positive1. This reaction is part of a broader system involving the anterior insula and midcingulate cortex, regions linked to how we anticipate and respond to uncertain outcomes2.
In short, your discomfort with change isn’t just emotional; it’s biological. Your brain interprets unfamiliar situations as potential threats, pushing you toward what’s known, even if it no longer serves you.
But change isn’t a betrayal. It’s a refinement.
You’re not meant to stay the same. You’re meant to grow. And real growth often comes with discomfort. Not the discomfort of hustle or burnout, but the discomfort of transformation.
The discomfort of becoming someone new.
Someone closer to the person you aspire to be.
A self-disciplined life requires reflection
If you want to live with intention and discipline, you need to pause and reflect:
What has changed in me lately?
Was it intentional?
Am I proud of that change, or did it happen while I wasn’t paying attention?
This isn’t about guilt; it’s about awareness. You can’t adapt to what you don’t notice. You can’t realign with your purpose if you never check the map.
Discipline isn’t a chain. It’s a compass. It doesn’t lock you down; it helps you find your way back when you drift.
And drifting isn’t failure. It’s part of the process. But only if you’re willing to notice and willing to change.
In the coming weeks, I’ll explore this further: how to guide change with intentionality, how to reconnect with earlier versions of yourself, and how to use change not as a threat to discipline, but as proof of it.
For now, ask yourself:
Would your younger self admire the direction you’re going?
And if not, what would it take to change that?
Have a wonderful week!
Self Disciplined is a weekly newsletter helping people build sustainable discipline without burnout. Through mindset shifts, personal stories, and actionable tools, I write about how to stay consistent, bounce back faster, and live with intention. If you're working on habits, focus, or resilience, this is for you.
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Cornwell BR, Didier PR, Grogans SE, Anderson AS, Islam S, Kim HC, Kuhn M, Tillman RM, Hur J, Scott ZS, Fox AS, DeYoung KA, Smith JF, Shackman AJ. A shared threat-anticipation circuit is dynamically engaged at different moments by certain and uncertain threat. bioRxiv [Preprint]. 2025 Feb 4:2024.07.10.602972. doi: 10.1101/2024.07.10.602972. Update in: J Neurosci. 2025 Apr 16;45(16):e2113242025. doi: 10.1523/JNEUROSCI.2113-24.2025. PMID: 39026814; PMCID: PMC11257510.
LOLOLOL 😂😂😂😊
Neuroscience reveals that our brains are wired to favor predictability. The amygdala, known as the brain's fear center, becomes activated in response to uncertainty, triggering a threat response , even when the change might be positive¹.
So much chemical reaction inside our brain 🙃.
Came to know by reading this article only.
Good read😃