How an Epiphany Changed the Way I Approach Life

And why it will change yours too.

These last couple of weeks have been rough. Strangely enough, writing has become a form of therapy for me. Instead of dreading it, I now look forward to it.

I’m deeply grateful for writing and for the extra motivation you—yes, you, the reader—have brought into my life. When I started this publication, it was meant to be a space for my mind to relax and pour out my learnings, reflections, and pieces of my philosophy. Knowing that you read and find value in my journey is a gift in itself.

Now, you might be wondering: why am I suddenly expressing so much gratitude? Recently, to my surprise, I’ve realized that I haven’t practiced gratitude deeply or consistently throughout my life. A medical scare not long ago made me question everything—my life, my choices, my habits, and even the way I handle stress. One of the biggest revelations has been about my perspective on gratitude.

The Epiphany That Shifted My Perspective

My dad is one of the most positive people I know—he sees the silver lining in everything. For a long time, I considered it a bit cheesy. You know, given my own struggles, I’ve learned the hard way that it’s okay not to feel okay. When I’d call him to share my troubles, he’d remind me that things could be worse, that there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. It came from a place of love and goodness¹, but what I really needed in those moments was someone to commiserate with, someone to just listen.

Now I understand that, given the long distance between us, this was his way of helping me—because he’ll always go out of his way to help. His best way of doing so is by trying to lift my spirits, using the tools he knows and trusts.

After my recent medical scare, I found myself reflecting deeply on life. Why did it take something so frightening for me to truly value what I’ve had all along? This moment of clarity led me to reprocess some of my past conversations with my dad—conversations that, despite my initial resistance, had quietly stuck with me over the years.

It hit me: my dad’s relentless positivity isn’t just a personality trait—it’s rooted in something deeper. It’s his gratitude. That’s how he’s been able to weather the ups and downs of life, how he’s faced challenges with resilience and grace. Gratitude is his foundation, and it’s a lesson I’m only now beginning to fully appreciate.

Lessons from My Dad's Gratitude

My dad is the seventh of eight siblings, and growing up as one of the youngest in a developing Chile, his childhood was far from easy.

The Chile of 2024 is a world apart from the Chile of the 1950s. Today, it stands as an upper-middle-income country, recognized as one of South America's most stable economies². Ranked around 44th globally by nominal GDP as of 2021³, Chile is often seen as a leader in Latin America. It’s one of only two South American nations, alongside Colombia, to be a member of the OECD⁴.

Santiago, Chile in 2019 — by Ximena Nahmias

But back in the 1950s, Chile was grappling with significant economic challenges. High inflation, averaging around 50% per year⁵, and an over-reliance on copper exports created instability. While the country maintained relative political stability, social inequality and widespread poverty, particularly in rural areas⁶, shaped the everyday reality for many, including my father.

These struggles left their mark on my dad’s childhood and youth. Later, as an adult, he lived and built his life during a politically divided Chile⁷—a chapter in the country’s history that would leave deep scars on its population for decades.

My grandparents didn’t have much, but they gave everything they could to their children. Naturally, as the youngest, my dad often got the "last pick," wearing third- or fourth-hand clothes passed down from his older siblings. On the flip side, being the youngest also meant he got off a little easier when it came to discipline—a small silver lining in a tough upbringing.

When my dad talks about his life, he never dwells on the hardships. Instead, he speaks with pride about the good things in life today. It wasn’t an easy path, but somehow, he turned it into a great one. Against all odds, he earned a professional degree, built a happy marriage, raised three sons who love him deeply, and now, he basks in the joy of being a proud grandfather.

How could he not be grateful?

This realization has been eye-opening for me. My dad’s life and perspective have taught me that, while it’s okay to feel not okay, we should also recognize the blessings in our lives. We should feel proud of how far we’ve come, appreciate the present, and honor the journey that got us here. Gratitude isn’t just a momentary emotion—it’s a practice, a daily choice that can lead to genuine happiness.

I realized I’ve been taking too much for granted. It’s time to focus on what truly matters and embrace a mindset of gratitude, just like my dad has always done.

I realized I needed to change how I approach gratitude.

Gratitude is a Mindset

One of the things I’ve learned—or perhaps rediscovered recently—is that gratitude is a mindset. It’s a choice we can make, even in the face of life’s challenges, just like my dad did.

Life is full of ups and downs, with moments when it feels like everything is stacked against us. Yet, even amidst these hurdles, we have the power to choose gratitude. It’s not about waiting for perfection or that elusive “right time” to appreciate what we have. Instead, it’s about recognizing the blessings we’ve already received, no matter how small or overshadowed they might seem. As the Stoic Sage and Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius wisely said in Meditations (paid link):

"Do not indulge in dreams of having what you have not, but reckon up the chief of the blessings you do possess, and then thankfully remember how you would crave for them if they were not yours."

This timeless wisdom reminds us to focus on the present, to see the value in what’s right before us, and to ground ourselves in the richness of our current lives. It’s an invitation to step away from the “grass is greener on the other side” mentality and instead find joy in the garden we’re already tending.

Gratitude, then, becomes a practice —something we actively engage in. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking life will get better when we achieve some distant goal or acquire something we lack. But choosing to be grateful is about shifting that perspective. It’s about recognizing that even in the struggle, even in the grind, we’ve already come a long way. It’s that quiet acknowledgment that we are more than the sum of our struggles and that there are countless little victories we often overlook.

This shift in mindset can fundamentally change the way we approach life. When we practice gratitude, we open ourselves up to see the good, even in the mundane. It allows us to move forward with a sense of contentment and peace. In the next section, I’ll share how embracing gratitude doesn’t just make us feel better—it can actively transform our lives.

How Gratitude Impacts Every Area of Our Lives

“Nothing is more honorable than a grateful heart.”

Seneca

Gratitude isn’t just a feel-good concept—it’s a mindset with the ability to profoundly transform every corner of our lives. Whether it’s our mental health, physical well-being, relationships, or work performance, gratitude has visible and measurable impacts. Here’s how:

• Improves Mental Health: Reduces stress and increases optimism.

• Boosts Physical Health: Enhances sleep quality and lowers blood pressure.

• Strengthens Relationships: Deepens bonds with loved ones and builds new connections.

• Enhances Work Performance: Increases motivation and self-esteem.

Let’s explore these areas in more depth to uncover why gratitude holds such power and how it can shape a better version of our lives.

Mental Health & Well-being

Gratitude has a profound impact on how we navigate our internal world. A 2003 study by Emmons & McCullough revealed that people who maintained gratitude journals experienced greater life satisfaction and optimism about the future⁸.

Words hold immense power. By regularly documenting things we’re grateful for, we can begin rewiring our brains to focus on positivity, gradually adopting gratitude as a core mindset. Professor Robert Emmons, a pioneer in gratitude research, highlights how this daily practice transforms fleeting moments of thankfulness into a resilient, proactive mindset.

Gratitude's effects compound over time—a theme you might recognize in many of my articles. Research by Martin Seligman and colleagues demonstrated that practicing gratitude through simple exercises, like writing down three good things daily, showed increasing benefits over time. Their study found that participants not only maintained but actually experienced growing improvements in happiness and reductions in depressive symptoms, with effects lasting up to six months⁹. By acknowledging life's positives regularly, we can significantly elevate our mood and satisfaction, creating a ripple effect across our lives.

Physical Health

While gratitude's mental benefits are well-documented, its impact on physical health may surprise you. Gratitude doesn’t just make you feel better—it can make you be better.

Research shows it helps you sleep better and supports heart health. A 2009 study by Wood et al. found that gratitude improves sleep quality by quieting those nagging negative thoughts before bed¹⁰. Similarly, McCraty and Childre’s work demonstrates that gratitude positively affects your heart, improving heart rate variability and even helping to lower blood pressure¹¹. These benefits serve as a natural counterbalance to the stress-related challenges we often face when anxiety and depression take hold.

In short, gratitude isn’t just good for the mind—it’s a holistic health booster.

Relationships

Gratitude isn’t something you have to keep to yourself. Sharing it can enrich your relationships, deepening bonds and building trust with loved ones.

Love thrives on trust, compassion, respect, and gratitude. Studies like the one conducted by Gordon et al. (2011) show that expressing gratitude to a partner leads to increased relationship satisfaction and connection¹². Simply acknowledging a loved one’s kindness or support strengthens the foundation of the relationship.

Moreover, gratitude extends beyond romantic or familial relationships. It’s a social catalyst that fosters and strengthens connections, even with acquaintances¹³. Expressing gratitude makes others feel valued, opening the door to deeper, more meaningful interactions.

Work Life

Gratitude doesn’t just make you a happier person; it can also make you a better performer.

In the workplace, gratitude fosters a sense of value and motivation. Research shows that athletes with higher levels of gratitude experience increased self-esteem¹⁴, and employees who feel appreciated by their supervisors are more motivated and productive¹⁵. Gratitude creates a positive feedback loop—acknowledgment leads to engagement, which in turn drives better results.

Whether expressed or internalized, gratitude helps us see the bigger picture, reminding us of the purpose behind our efforts and encouraging us to push forward with determination.

Practicing Disciplined Gratitude

There’s a book I read recently that I can’t recommend enough: The Code of the Extraordinary Mind (paid link), by Vishen Lakhiani, the founder of Mindvalley. In it, Lakhiani presents a powerful argument for gratitude as a transformative force. He suggests that gratitude can shift our focus away from what we lack and toward what we already have, creating a foundation for positive thinking and sustained motivation. This simple shift in perspective, he believes, aligns us with a state of abundance, enhancing both our emotional resilience and our capacity for joy.

One of the standout elements of the book is Lakhiani’s structured approach to gratitude. He proposes focusing on three specific areas: personal experiences, professional experiences, and relationships. By regularly practicing gratitude in these domains, he argues, we can cultivate a more balanced and fulfilling perspective, leading to greater satisfaction and overall well-being. I’ll be honest—reading this book shifted some of my mindset and made me more intentional about expressing gratitude in my daily life.

That said, turning gratitude into a habit requires consistency and discipline. It doesn’t have to look exactly like Lakhiani’s method, but you need to develop a structured practice that you can stick to regularly. If you’ve followed my other articles, you know this is where self-discipline becomes essential. Building any meaningful habit takes time, but the payoff is worth it.

If you’re wondering where to start, here are some simple gratitude practices to help you incorporate this mindset into your life:

• Gratitude Journaling
  Write down 3–5 things you’re grateful for each day. This practice helps reframe your perspective, focusing on positives instead of challenges, and gradually strengthens a gratitude-driven mindset.

• Gratitude Letters or Notes
  Write a heartfelt letter or note to someone you appreciate. Whether or not you send it, the act of articulating your gratitude can have a profound emotional impact.

• Gratitude Meditation
  During meditation, focus on things, people, or experiences you’re thankful for. Combining mindfulness with gratitude fosters calmness and appreciation simultaneously.

• Morning and Evening Gratitude Check-ins
  Start or end your day by mentally listing a few things you’re thankful for. This simple habit can set a positive tone for the day or help you reflect with peace at night.

• Gratitude Jar
  Write down small moments of gratitude on slips of paper and collect them in a jar. Over time, it becomes a visual reminder of all the good in your life—and a boost when you need one.

• Sharing Gratitude with Others
  Make it a point to verbally express thanks to those around you. Acknowledging others’ kindness strengthens bonds and builds a positive social environment.

• Visualization of Positives
  Spend a moment visualizing the people, events, or moments you’re grateful for. This quick mental exercise keeps your focus on abundance rather than scarcity.

Takeaways

Gratitude is a mindset—a conscious choice we make every day. Let my experience serve as a gentle reminder: we shouldn’t take the little things for granted. Instead, we should embrace gratitude as a daily practice. When we make this shift in perspective, gratitude has the power to ripple through every area of our lives, leaving a lasting impact.

The practices I’ve shared with you are simple and approachable, but their true power lies in consistency. With steady effort, gratitude can evolve from an occasional emotion into a foundational part of your mindset—one that doesn’t just transform how you feel in the moment but reshapes how you approach life itself.

What are you grateful for today? Start a gratitude practice with me, and let’s make this mindset shift together.

Have a wonderful week!

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Thank you for your support!

1. Dad, if you are reading this, I love you ❤️

2. World Bank. "Chile Overview." https://www.worldbank.org/en/country/chile/overview

3. International Monetary Fund. "World Economic Outlook Database, October 2021."

4. OECD. "Chile and the OECD." https://www.oecd.org/chile/

5. Braun, Juan, et al. "Economía Chilena 1810-1995: Estadísticas Históricas." Pontificia Universidad Católica de Chile, 2000.

6. De Ramón, Armando. "Santiago de Chile: Historia de una Sociedad Urbana." Editorial Sudamericana, 2000.

7. If you are interested, read about Chile on the 1970’s!

8. Emmons, R. A., & McCullough, M. E. (2003). "Counting blessings versus burdens: An experimental investigation of gratitude and subjective well-being in daily life." Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(2), 377-389.

9. Seligman, M. E. P., Steen, T. A., Park, N., & Peterson, C. (2005). "Positive psychology progress: Empirical validation of interventions." American Psychologist, 60(5), 410-421.

10. Wood, A. M., Joseph, S., Lloyd, J., & Atkins, S. (2009). "Gratitude influences sleep through the mechanism of pre-sleep cognitions." Journal of Psychosomatic Research, 66(1), 43-48.

11. McCraty, R., & Childre, D. (2004). "The grateful heart: The psychophysiology of appreciation." The Psychology of Gratitude, 230-255.

12. Gordon, A. M., Impett, E. A., Kogan, A., Oveis, C., & Keltner, D. (2012). "To have and to hold: Gratitude promotes relationship maintenance in intimate bonds." Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 103(2), 257-274.

13. Williams, L. A., & Bartlett, M. Y. (2015). "Warm thanks: Gratitude expression facilitates social affiliation in new relationships via perceived warmth." Emotion, 15(1), 1-5.

14. Chen, L. H., & Wu, C. H. (2014). "Gratitude enhances change in athletes' self-esteem: The moderating role of trust in coach." Journal of Applied Sport Psychology, 26(3), 349-362.

15. Glassdoor Team. (2019). "Employee Appreciation Survey." Glassdoor Economic Research.