What Is Your Purpose? — Issue #2: Stefano Miele

Purpose isn't fixed; it's ever changing

Hi everyone,

Welcome to the second issue of our biweekly series, "What Is Your Purpose?"

For those of you that are new, “What Is Your Purpose?” is a space where I invite writers from different platforms to share the deeper "why" behind their work.

I’m really excited to introduce today’s guest.

When I first joined Substack — it feels like forever ago, but it was just eight months back, in September 2024 — I was still finding my way around. There were already so many creators sharing their interests, growing their newsletters, and offering advice. And somewhere along the way, I crossed paths with Stefano.

Stefano Miele is the creator of good to know. In his own words, he writes for people who are tired of the 9-5 grind — people who are ready to step out of their comfort zone, conquer fear, and build a life they control, with purpose and growth at the center.

Purpose.

What drives Stefano to help others build a life with purpose? What fuels his mission?

Let’s hear it from him directly.

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The day my life changed course

It was around this time last year when I finally realised I was deeply unhappy with my life—the result of poor choices, a failing relationship, and an unhealthy environment.

I didn't understand why I felt the way I did because I rarely took the time to reflect on my daily existence.

I dragged myself to a job I didn't enjoy just because I felt like I needed a pay-check. I survived the weekdays, crawling to the weekend where I could escape by smoking my problems away with people who didn't even care about me.

If I'm honest, I reached a point where I was disgusted with myself.

I knew I could be doing so much better—but I was lazy and undisciplined about making changes because the discomfort and uncertainty of doing things differently terrified me.

The moment everything changed?

The 30th June 2024.

When my ex-girlfriend and I split up.

This became the day I finally decided to wake up and make meaningful changes in my life.

One quote remains stamped in my memory, guiding everything I do:

"Everyone has two lives, and the second begins the moment you realise you only have one" — Confucius

Finding my path through words

My purpose emerged organically through writing.

I started my journey on Substack less than 10 months ago. And the only reason I began writing was to make sense of my messy mind. I didn't think I needed therapy—I've always believed in solving your own problems. With the right effort and commitment, you can overcome almost any challenge.

Writing has helped me in more ways than I expected.

Most importantly, it's given me something I lacked so much in life—confidence.

Writing has given me the confidence to:

• Quit my job

• Start my own business

• Help others who were in the same position I was 10 months ago take responsibility for their lives

• Emerge from my previous relationship stronger than I ever expected

• Share my experiences with others online

These are all benefits I've experienced because I began putting my thoughts into words.

A purpose still forming

Now, my purpose isn't 100% clear yet, but one of my main drivers is helping people who felt exactly as I did 10 months ago. I want to show them how to take responsibility for their lives, embrace discomfort, act on their thoughts, and live life on their own terms.

It's what I'm trying to do right now.

And although it's challenging, I know there is no way I can fail in my mission if I continue pushing forward, knocking on doors, and doing my best to pull them open.

Either way, life is going to be hard.

So you might as well pick your battles—and ensure they are fights you're willing to show up for and do your best in.

When I lost my way

The journey isn't always easy—I've learned this path is difficult.

I've been travelling through South-East Asia for the last four months. In my mind, I thought this was the perfect time to start a business and ramp up my writing.

However, writing took a backseat during this time, and I no longer took it as seriously as I wanted to. This didn't sit right with me. I could feel tension building as thoughts remained unreleased in my mind.

So I decided to take a step back and reflect:

• What do I truly want right now?

• Is how I'm living aligned with what I want?

I knew it wasn't.

I got back on track by deciding to cut my travels short.

My priorities right now in life are building my business and continuing to write online (hoping to generate income eventually). Because no matter how much we tell ourselves we don't need money—we do. Money solves our financial problems, allowing us to spend time on what truly matters.

That's how I realigned—through reflection, honesty, and deciding what matters most to me.

The fluid nature of purpose

Purpose isn't fixed.

It's not something you decide once and then follow through religiously. It's constantly in motion as your desires evolve. We are humans, and it's normal to change your mind as your world-view shifts.

If there's one thing I've learned over the past year, it's this:

Pick a destination and start taking steps towards it.

The road is never going to be straight. You'll be thrown off course constantly. But you will eventually get to your destination if you just keep on getting up and walking.

Confucius said we begin our second life when we realise we only have one.

Are you still living your first life?

Or, are you now living your second?

What sparked that realisation for you, and how has it changed your path?

~

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Thank you, Stefano, for sharing something as deep as your journey.

Having the chance to read Stefano’s work before publishing it — the perks of the editor — there is a thought that resonated a lot with me. Mainly because it was a personal discovery for me not too long ago:

Purpose isn't fixed.

It's not something you decide once and then follow through religiously. It's constantly in motion as your desires evolve. We are humans, and it's normal to change your mind as your world-view shifts.

When we think about purpose, we tend to think in absolutes. That if you find a purpose, that purpose will be your lifetime purpose.

It’s not like that.

As Stefano says, we change. Our worldview changes. Our purpose changes.

And it’s okay.

So as an exercise, start by asking yourself:

What do I believe is my purpose?

That will build a baseline for your discovery, as you can start navigating your life through the lens of that purpose.

Have a wonderful week!

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Stefano writes for people tired of following the same 9-5 routine, ready to step out of their comfort zone, conquer fear, and build a life they control with purpose and growth.

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If you’ve made it this far — thank you for your interest!

I always appreciate feedback, thoughts, questions, or collaboration ideas. Feel free to reach out anytime at camilo@self-disciplined.com.